"It's all about love" was written on our shirts as Jenn and I (with Emily) ran in the "Love 'em or Leave 'em" Valentine's Day 5K Dash. Did I mention in my last post that Jennifer is the friend who convinced me to join the swim team?
It's funny how things come full circle. Here I am at the last mile - in my mind, I've reached my max, my breathes were getting heavy and I was close to passing out. There Jennifer is in front of me running backwards - encouraging me to give it my all as she whispers, "Ranny, do you see that girl in purple shirt. You don't want her to beat you, do you?" (Typical, Jennifer.) Then, this girl has the nerve to ask me if I were going to wear my booties at my birthday party tomorrow - as if I could have a casual conversation. "I know you're mad at me right now, but I'm only pushing you because I know you can do it," she says. A little irked, I push harder anyway. At the end, she grabs my hands and we cross the finish line together.
Even though I almost passed out at the end, there were no failed flip turns. I raced in my first 5K. Jennifer registered us for the race as a birthday gift and told me that this race was about me. She stuck with me the entire way through even though she could have gotten a faster time than what we got together (which was a little over 26 min). Now that I think about it, she was there cheering me on seven years ago as I was struggling in the water at my first (and only) swim meet but this time I could actually hear her.
My ears may not have been submerged in water but throughout my life I have lived as if they were. It may not have been water that obstructed my hearing - instead, there were doubts and insecurities that didn't allow me to hear the people around me encouraging me and rooting for me. On our ride back down, Jenn said to me after learning that this was my first 5K race, "Ranny, you did really well - not a lot of people can run a 8.22 pace in their first 5K." My natural response would be, "Well, I've ran a half-marathon. I could've done better" - instead, I didn't respond. I took it in and accepted the acknowledgment.
In the yoga studio, I find myself always trying to push myself even further before I perfect my form and be with the pose for a moment. When I do this, I end up with a wobbly foundation, losing my balance or out of focus. Yesterday, this thought came into my head, "It's when I'm trying to get somewhere that I get nowhere." What I've gotten out of today is that that "somewhere" is here and that "someday" is now. I will always meet new people along my journey through life - some will stay longer than others - but there are those who are in my life now - some that has been apart of my life for over 15 years through rolling hills and rocky pavement.
This is what I call Love.
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